The Man in the Mirror

‘I’m starting with the man in the mirror. I’m asking him to change his ways. No message could have been any clearer, if you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change.” Michael Jackson

I, too, have decided to start with the woman in the mirror….in fact, I start with her every morning and I ask myself, “who can I help today so that God gets the glory and I live my purpose?” I think that we rush through life and forget to take the time to examine ourselves and ensure that we are being authentic and effectively using integrity and service as our most powerful character trait.

When I started Incredible One Enterprises, I developed a lot of “Incredible-isms” to illustrate the steps I believe are necessary to operate an Incredible life. One of those steps/principles, is the concept I aptly titled ‘Inspect the Incredible’ or completing that all important self-assessment. I can’t remember which rap group and song says “check yourself before you wreck yourself,” but that is exactly what comes to mind when I think of Michael Jackson’s song and my concept of Inspecting the Incredible.

It is so important to take a look at your life and make sure that who you are is who you want to be and who others see you as is who you want to be seen as. Now, I am not suggesting that you allow others opinions of you to carry too much weight, but I do believe that you can tell a tree (a pillar of society that offers nourishment and strength) by the fruit it bears and of course you alredy know that if you are going to bear fruit, I think it should be passion fruit!

So how often do I complete this “Inspect the Incredible” step, Darnyelle? The simple answer is as often as you feel the need but minimally, I believe that each quarter or as the seasons change, we need to begin by inspecting ourselves. Each season in our life brings new challenges and rewards and having the personal stability to weather the seasons is essential to the Incredible You.

What do I do when I am “Inspecting the Incredible,” Darnyelle? To borrow/rearrange a line from a Smokey Robinson hit, “Tracks of My Tears,” “Take a good look at your face but if your smile is out of place, look closer and start to trace what needs to change in order for that frown to become a smile again. I think that being honest with yourself and asking yourself those tough questions like, “what do I hear about me from other people?, who do I think that I am? Am I successful at creating a brand that speaks to who I believe God created me to be?, etc. is a good place to start. I would also like to point out getting my 2nd book, The Incredible You can help as I included a detailed, thought provoking self-assessment in the book and my readers are telling me that it was just what they needed to finally define and unleash the Incredible inside.

There is so much more to Inspecting the Incredible….determining if your life bears fruit is so essential and of course, you’ve got to ask yourself if you are fertilizer or weed killer….adding or subtracting value….keeping relationships with people who are where you want to be and pulling you up versus bringing you down….keeping a positive attitude…speaking life affirming words over yourself and others….I could go on and on….

I think you get my point.

Grab a mirror and get started. We will all be glad that you did.

Be Incredible,

Darnyelle A. Jervey is the founder and Chief Empowerment Officer of Incredible One Enterprises,LLC a full service empowerment firm specializing in keynotes, seminars, workshops and books designed to define and unleash the Incredible in you using her P.A.C.E. Method. For more information, please visit

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